It’s April 2, and tomorrow I have a test I really need to study for. I have an 8-page essay I need to deliver on the 10th, and a test on the same day. On the 19th I have two tests, and on the 23rd I have something I need to deliver and that I’ve been postponing since at least January, or something. Not to mention my responsibilities to my course’s Commission, which I joined because I can be an impulsive idiot when I want to. Basically, what you need to know is that this semester was specifically designed to spite me, and that if a teacher warns you that he will be giving out a lot of classwork, DO NOT TAKE IT AS A CHALLENGE. Seriously, it seems like my stubbornness only comes in situations when it will only harm me. Why can’t it come when I’m trying to improve my writing life, or when I’m trying to stand up for myself?
Also I turned 21 two weeks ago. Yay, me?
I don’t mean this to be an excuse, or anything. It’s just that I feel swamped right now, and kind of disappointed because I’ve decided to not join Camp NaNo this month after all. And I’m glad I’ve decided not to, because it means that I’m actually sane and that I remember what happened last November– complete disaster, as I was super busy back then as well. I don’t remember if I even got halfway through or not. Probably not.
Like, part of me insists that I could achieve something, at least during Easter break, which to me will happen from the 12th to the 18th. And, sure, I have two tests on the 19th, but only one of them requires real study (the other requires me to stay awake, since it’s at 6pm and my classes start at 10am and I have no breaks, so that’ll be fun). Oh yeah, and there’s that little detail that I probably wouldn’t be able to write every day, anyway.
The problem is that I haven’t even finished the outline, yet. I reached the Character Summary part, but even that is unfinished. I could try doing it without the outline, but the story is a bit too jumbled right now, even for me, and I really want some extra time to work on it.
Despite all of this, I would still like to do something this month. I thought about taking a break until my life isn’t a complete disaster, but I still want to keep working on my writing. Hell, I even bought two more books on Creative Writing and I’m dying to get to them. I won’t be able to do so for now, though, since I already have enough to worry about, but there’s that to look forward to!
So, I came up with a plan.
Plans for April
This is a bit different from a Map, because a Map generally has a clear path that I want to take. This is just me stranded in the middle of the sea and trying to find a way back on track. So, what am I doing in April?
I would like to keep working on the story outline. I don’t know if I’ll reach the end this month, and I won’t force myself to do so in detriment of everything else I have going on and the story’s quality, just for the sake of completing the outline. I would like to get it done before Camp NaNo in July, when I can finally work on it without worrying (unless I have to go somewhere, but I won’t know until then because no one ever tells me anything). If I do manage to complete the outline this month, which I think is unlikely, I’ll do an improvised Camp NaNo in May and use the July Camp for editing.
I won’t be updating the project page, in fact I’m going to hide it after publishing this post. This is for personal reasons, really, though I will keep updating on my progress. I’m also planning on making at least one post a week, like I used to, for the simple reason that I feel that I’ve been neglecting the blog. The whole point of this was to make me feel comfortable posting to a personal blog, so I’m kind of failing in that regard, though I do feel more confident as time passes.
These posts won’t have a specific publishing day, because my real life schedule is wild right now. They can be about anything, from my life or a subject that I care about, or even a short story if I feel up to it. That’s something I should start considering doing again, I do miss writing short stories.
That’s it from me. Now, I’m going to get ready for the day, study a little and see if my grandma can offer me lunch.